I’m finally an adult! I’ve done so much growing up over the past year (a real job, moving in with the boyfriend, prescription glasses, getting a cat!). It only felt right that I celebrate this maturation by asking friends to go to a nice dinner.
Top 7 Reasons Why Medieval Times was the best birthday spot EVER:
7) Food, no utensils, but who needs those!? And you get Goblets. Drinking is pretty fun, but drinking out of huge goblets is SUPER fun. The dinner was actually pretty good and they accommodate vegetarians. It comes in three courses; soup and bread, half of a chicken and potatoes, some delicious pastry thing. Not really carb-conscious but remember fat was cool back then.
6) PONIESSS! Beautiful white galloping horses doing all sorts of pony trickery. Heaven.
5) Speaking of ponies…Real life jousting! When is this coming back? I’d much rather watch a couple of guys jousting on stallions than that creepy UFC man-humping stuff everyone is so crazy about.
4) They announce your birthday! The king has a scroll and at one point during the show he announces all of the birthdays, “A very happy 6th birthday to lady Jessica Swanson, a very happy 11th birthday to sir Jimmy Redland… a very happy 28th birthday to lady Leah…” Not only do they announce your birthday but there were several anniversaries and bachelor parties there. Yes, you heard correctly.
3) Medieval Times talk- ‘Hear ye Hear ye! Noble knights and ladies of the court, Let thine own honor be tested to the depths of fine artistry by challenge of true virtue. Step aside wench!’ Yeah, it doesn’t even really make sense but it’s really fun regardless.
2) THE SHOW. It is absolutely awesome. Basically there are 6 knights and depending on your section you root for that knight. My voice now sounds like Bob Dylan after cheering so hard for the Green Knight! And there’s music and lights and a villain and so many horses. Our lame knight lost but he did throw me a flower at one point so he is forgiven.
1) COSTUMES! Come on, who doesn’t love dressing up? It’s hilarious.
“I want to be the king. “ (boyfriend in costume store dressing room).
“No, try this one on” (me, handing him the minstrel in tights costume).
“No, no way. I’m not wearing this. I told you, I want to be a king.”
(shaking my head no) “It’s MY birthday and you are wearing the Rat Fluter in Tights costume.”